AUDIO DIARIES & TRANSCRIPTS

Sofia Lamb - To My Daughter

To my daughter, Eleanor. Soon, you will be born and Rapture will be your home. You shall be raised as I was, to advance the common good through social psychiatry.

This city's potential is immeasurable, Eleanor... yet our beliefs are unwelcome here. Life will be difficult. But the price of revolution is always clear. If we are patient with her... Rapture will come to us.

Sofia Lamb - Ryan vs Lamb: Reality

Ryan: White is not black, Doctor Lamb, down is not up, and straw is not gold. Look around you. Rapture is no miracle, it is a product of reason, impossible unless one and one are two, and A equates to A.

(crowd murmur, tense, some agreement)

Lamb: And yet... alone, each man is a prisoner to bias. Dream, delusion... or the pain of a phantom limb-to one man, they are as real as rain. Reality is consensus... and the people are losing faith. Take a walk, Andrew. It is raining in Rapture... and you have simply chosen not to notice.

(angry half-cheering in agreement)

Sofia Lamb - Know the Beast

In ethical psychiatry, we must account for the role of evolution. Depression, fits of panic, sexual pathos-all responses to ancient selection pressure.

The irony is that this theory is why Ryan's people invited me here. They mistake my study of natural law for the worship of competition. Remember, Eleanor-one must know the beast before it can be slain.

Sofia Lamb - Eleanor's Progress

Eleanor is progressing brilliantly. My physical participation in her birth was... minimized, of course-it is vital that I am unhindered by nature's crude bias.

I will be, above all, her intellectual progenitor... loyal not to her, but to the people she will ultimately save. But, I admit, it is with some measure of pride that I review her marks in standard intelligence tests.

As an agent of our beliefs... she may surpass even me.

Sofia Lamb - Rapture is Deliverance

I know the surface, Eleanor. I spent half a lifetime there, in service of the common good. But then, I heard my own words twisted by fat old men, squatting over the embers of Hiroshima.

Were the modern world a patient in my care, I would diagnose it suicidal. On perhaps that point alone, Andrew Ryan is correct. Rapture... is deliverance.

Sofia Lamb - Truth is in the Body

Rapture is a paradise of the ego, Eleanor. Under Ryan, the voices of an entire city sing the virtues of greed and pride.

But truth, rather, is in the body. Already they grow weary of struggling against one another in fruitless competition. Observe the bent backs, the drawn faces. "Ryan promised us more," they seem to say. "In what shall we now believe?"

And Eleanor... it is our task to answer.

Sofia Lamb - Ryan vs Lamb: Religious Rights

Ryan: Religious rights, Doctor? You are free to kneel before whatever tribal fetish you favor in the comfort of your own home. But in Rapture, liberty is our only law-A man's only duty is to himself. To imply otherwise, therefore, is criminal.

Lamb: Ask yourself, Andrew-what is your "Great Chain of Progress" but a faith? The chain is a symbol for an irrational force, guiding us towards ascension-no less mystic then the crucifixes you seize and burn.

(angry applause, shouting)

Sofia Lamb - Therapy with Grace 1

Grace: Doctor Lamb. Sofia. I came down here to sing, and to start a family... But I just don't fit with these people. Look at you. You fit with them.

Lamb: Grace... in Ryan's Rapture, I am the pariah. You and I share unpopular ideas, but I wonder... how devoted are you to the Rapture people? If you wish to know more, wear this butterfly brooch at our next session. If not... no harm done, we shall never speak of it again.

Sofia Lamb - Arrangements

Lamb: Now Eleanor, Mummy has to go away for a while. You shall be staying with Aunt Gracie.
Eleanor: Mummy, don't go... (edge of crying)
Lamb: Eleanor, you are better than that. Do you remember what I told you?
Eleanor (miserable): I am very special.
Lamb: That's right. And what else?
Eleanor: (still sad): I was born to change the world.
Lamb: Yes. And when Mummy returns home... the world will be very different indeed. She will make it ready for you.

Sofia Lamb - The Requirements of Utopia

Rapture... the keenest minds in the world, united under the ocean... yet somehow expected to subscribed to the same model of self-interest? Ryan could be staggeringly naive.

As individuals, no matter how brilliant-each was a prisoner to his or her own ego; a sea of dreams in constant flux.

But in ADAM, their genes remain, ready to be tested against a moral vessel. Utopia cannot precede the Utopian. It will exist the moment we are fit to occupy it.

Sofia Lamb - Shackled to the Great Chain

Until ADAM, the human animal was a slave to the gene... the inner tyrant. Lust... greed... rage-self obsession was etched into our DNA. We were not pulling the "Great Chain of progress," as Ryan believed, but shackled to it.

But now, in theory, we can redraft the human blueprint. Serving the common interest can become as natural as breathing. The tyrant will simply go extinct.

Sofia Lamb - Therapy with Grace 2

Grace: All right, Doctor... I'm here. But don't think wearing this butterfly means I'm happy.

Sofia Lamb: Grace. I know you all too well. Want of child defines you. But biological loyalty turns us against the rest of the world, whom we ought to love in equal measure. Your poverty is testament to that... but your voice inspires the people. I am asking you to join a much larger family. Though your body failed you... you shall live on in us.

Sofia Lamb - Learning Poker

You must learn to play poker, Eleanor. Like anyone, I am flawed, and have a fierce genetic bias towards competition. But each Saturday, I read the other players... and I pick a man who will benefit the most from victory. By the final hand, I ensure that he takes home my entire stake, and that of the others.

I win nothing but the feeling of conquest over myself, and the wealth of my competitors is slowly reshuffled according to their needs.

Sofia Lamb - A Spy

At last, we have our Judas...

One of my own people has been feeding Ryan evidence of my activities, and now I am to be detained. As a religion, they merely monitored us. But as a commune, they would see us crucified.

And yet... though he will be the last to see it, Andrew Ryan has already lost the people. Wherever I am sent, Rapture will follow.

Sofia Lamb - The Voice of the Self

Awareness of self is no miracle, Eleanor... it is a trick of the gene, and endless inner refrain, asking: "What's in it for me?"

To serve the world , we must grow deaf to the self. Are you ready? Now, stop listening to my voice. Stop listening. Stop. Difficult, isn't it? Human verbal cues are defensive coloration-camouflage. Play this recording until you no longer hear the words. Then you may observe the people for who they are.

Sofia Lamb - Means of Control

Prison, it seems, was a blessing-Ryan is now dead by his own son's hand.

But far more interesting is the program of compulsion bred into his child coded "W-Y-K." It was some manner of verbal "trigger phrase," which the boy would obey as an order unerringly.

In a way, this sad thing, this... half-man had escaped the self. Highly intelligent, but devoid of so-called "free will," with all its convenient blind spots.

What if he had been instructed to uphold the common good? What if he were a volunteer?

Sofia Lamb - A New Cognitive Model

This... this calls everything into question. Even as I record this, I can scarcely believe... Psychiatry has been my continual study... to chart consciousness in all its strata.

But intelligence does not require introspection... the son of Ryan was more effective than all his self-aware rivals. He lived without questions. I could end the self... and save the world.

Sofia Lamb - Gil's Place in the Plan

Dr. Alexander has agreed to accept both measures of the New Utopian project. He will become a kind of genetic chimera, host to all the minds of Rapture, accessing their talents and memories via the ADAM we have gathered.

And, deriving in part from Project W-Y-K, I have developed a new set of behavioral constraints: Dr Alexander will live to promote the common good... his love and loyalty shall be spread evenly across the entire human race.

For me, that is discipline at great personal cost. For him, at last... it will be instinct.

Sofia Lamb - Meltzer's Choice

Lamb: Ask yourself, Mr. Meltzer... is it better to be summarily executed as an outsider caught within these grounds, or to be united not just with your daughter Cindy, but with the Rapture Family as well?

The choice is yours... I urge you to accept the Protector Program. You will live by her side, and remember nothing beyond your love for her.

Meltzer: ...I wasn't the first to find Rapture, you crazy B#@!*. And I won't be the last. You do... whatever you want to me... as long as I'm with Cindy... I'm... I'm a happy man.

Sofia Lamb - The People's Daughter

Eleanor's condition may be a blessing in disguise. Early splicing tests indicate zero genetic damage due to her condition as a Little Sister. It appears that she... is our new vessel. This will be no mere personality schism, though... Rapture's genius will be held within her DNA, able to shift into desired patterns at will.

A Utopian cannot be confined to a single throw of the genetic dice. When needed, she is a composer. A dancer. An engineer. She truly will be the People's Daughter.

Sofia Lamb - Withholding Visitation

Eleanor is changing as Delta draws closer. In her sleep, she mutters about having witnessed... moments from his journey here. She is beginning to resist the moral conditioning. Eleanor's bond with Delta is turning her from the Daughter of the People back into a rebellious child, whose voice I do not recognize.

Worse, I suspect Eleanor of... direct involvement in his return. I fear that to separate them... I may have to... take measures for which I will be... unable to forgive myself.

Andrew Ryan - Generation

Diane insisted that we spend a weekend at the Adonis, and already I find myself seeking a respite from my vacation. When she deems it necessary to chide me for working, the words dissolve into an endless, animal bleat.

I founded Rapture to be free of law and god... to live among those for whom work is our wage!

Yet when Diane speaks of bearing my child... I am given pause. Until now, I had never considered my legacy. Perhaps... perhaps after the New Year.

Andrew Ryan - The Great Chain Rattles

I am told that the people grow tense and isolated in the absence of the sun. Now... they clamor for a psychiatrist. Do they miss the state censor, I wonder? Wartime seizure of private assets? Or the Cheka police, vanishing them in the night? Regardless, this Lamb woman is said to be the foremost practitioner in her 'field'. Fine. If she can quiet the rattling of the great chain's weakest links... I will leave her to it.

Andrew Ryan - Lamb the Problem, Sinclair the Solution

Lamb is becoming a problem. The woman is a damned collectivist-here, in Rapture-how could the council fail to see it? Worse, to hide her intent, she gulls these "patients" of hers into a religious frenzy. A new Kremlin will rise and swallow the council house before they realize they've been had!

I will not have my city swindled by the parasite, what its guise. It is time, I think, to call Sinclair.

Andrew Ryan - Efficacy

I know this facility is vital to the preservation of secrecy in Rapture. But seeing myself transformed into that... lurching, waxen nightmare... do children truly respond to this?

Still, I spoke to a young man exiting the park after the grand opening, asking him what, if anything, he had learned here. He said his chores didn't seem so bad anymore-as long as mother wouldn't send him to the surface.

Andrew Ryan - Pauper's Drop

Do you remember what you told me, Bill? A marketplace of ideas... that was you. If I submit to the debates with Lamb, we de fang her. I have done so. And have you been to Pauper's Drop, Bill? Listen:(The sound of Grace singing in a nightclub)

Between each song, these oblomovs hand out her manifesto. Her face adorns every wall. Saint Lamb. You made her, McDonagh... and now you will convince the council to sponsor her silence.

Andrew Ryan - Bury Her Memory

Sinclair, I don't care how you accomplish Lamb's removal from the public eye. Indeed, I'd rather cease contact with you altogether. But allow me to make this plain, I don't want to see Lamb on the streets again, peddling her Bolshevik fever dreams to my people. Bury her memory, Sinclair Bury it, and salt the earth.

Andrew Ryan - Lamb's Time is Over

I am told that Lamb has been seen in the streets... one of the Alpha Series was killed in the incident, and his bonded Sister stolen. But the council has no time for a manhunt; Atlas swells the ranks of his marauders by the day.

Regardless, Lamb's name has already faded among the people. She is no more than a ghost who has forgotten to die.

Andrew Ryan - Lamb's Idea of Art

Dionysus Park. Lamb mocks me in the naming of this place. She knows precisely how I feel about this celebration of "unconscious art." The Artist reflects the world as it ought to be, not as it is damned to be by some spasm of the lower mind. But I shall not censor. The park is Lamb's property.

However... if the case we are building against her proves true-I will return with a sledgehammer.

Andrew Ryan - Alone at Last

This facility belongs to the city now-to Ryan Industries... at least until the rioting subsides.

While it is unfortunate that such measures had to be taken... I must admit, it is gratifying to see this building condemned. Fontaine is gone, Lamb is gone... or close enough.

I am alone at last... alone with my city.

Andrew Ryan - Betrayal

I... visited Eve's Garden today... it ended poorly. My seed... sold to the enemy. The motive of the whore, as yet, eludes me. But Atlas approaches... and come what may, I will not be made a slave. I wonder... in recording, do I confess? Just now, Sinclair saw me in the corridor, perhaps reading my face. The bastard looked me right in the eye... and suggested I make an appointment with Doctor Lamb.

Andrew Ryan - A Stratagem for Sinclair

Need I remind you, Sinclair, that Lamb is your problem now? She is no longer a citizen of Rapture.

That was the proviso-you wanted her expertise, and now you have it. Ryan Industries is your client... and we require test candidates from among your charges. The Protectors are... short lived.

Lamb would be a messiah, correct? Well. Sell her a sacrifice to save the flock.

Eleanor Lamb - Mr. Tape Recorder

Hello Mr. Diary. Want to play?
"Actually, I'm quite busy right now, Miss Eleanor. Maybe later."
Well, all right. But do you mind if I take you apart while I wait? I promise I'll put you back together!
"Wait! You can't do thaaaat... noooo... waaaaiiiit, wait Eleaaanoooorrrr..."

Eleanor Lamb - Eat Dog

Sofia Lamb: In ethical psychiatry we must account... [sound of tape interrupt]

Eleanor Lamb: (giggle) Eleanor Lamb speaking. Mum says I'm not to play with the other children, because they're "being raised on a diet of dog-eat-dog."

I wanted to see these dog eaters... so I waited until Mum was gone... and went to find one... and guess what? The dog eaters wear human skins... it makes them look just like us!

Eleanor Lamb - Barbarism

I got in a fight with a dog eater today. His name is Amir, and he was picking on a smaller boy... we called a truce when his nose went red. But Mum says I'm becoming a barbarian. So I said, "Eleanor eat dog now too... Barbarian happy!"

And Mum said they only think they're happy, because they're selfish and ignorant.

Hmmph! "Eleanor think ignorant sound like fun!"

Eleanor Lamb - Misbehaving

Eleanor Lamb: Well, Mr. Diary-Mum's got a new security system to stop me from seeing Amir and the other kids. But security's just made of bits and bobs, like you are-and now we're the best of friends, isn't that right? Anyway, Amir's got a whole book about the surface-it has India and Ireland, and... and everywhere!

Yes, all right, Mr. Diary-if you must know, I do think Amir's kind of pretty for a dog eater.

(gasp) Oh no! Retreat!

Sofia Lamb: Eleanor! Come back here at once!

Eleanor Lamb - My Name is Eleanor

I'm all alone here, Mr. Diary. You're my whispering friend. A doctor keeps coming to see me. He says Rapture needs me, and tomorrow I'll be leaving with him. I ask why... and he just smiles. I'm not an orphan. Mum's alive somewhere. And Aunt Gracie is still probably looking for me.

But I can't wait for them. I'm going to escape and find Amir, and we'll steal a submarine. Before it's tomorrow, I'll know what sunshine feels like...

Eleanor Lamb - Life After Sisterhood

This is Eleanor Lamb speaking. It's been many years since my last diary. Mother found a way to rehabilitate me psychologically, but she can't remove this... thing inside my body. I look in the mirror, and I see a freak.

I remember very little-just an artificial sense of peace and a compulsive hunger for ADAM.

Doctor Alexander is trying to help me adjust. He's responsible for part of my condition, but he wants to make amends.

Eleanor Lamb - Goodbye, Dr. Alexander

Mother has destroyed Doctor Alexander... she tried to Splice him into some kind of living saint who would calculate the common good and adhere to it tirelessly. But now he's become... something unspeakable. Mother's philosophy is just as corrupt as Ryan's. By her standards, it would be better to have the entire world equally miserable then to allow us to strive in our own behalf.

I have to get out of here.

Eleanor Lamb - Blessing in Disguise

Mother says that my condition is a blessing in disguise; she constantly reminds me that I was born for the express purpose of promoting her ideals.

And now she's trying to convince me to begin splicing with the same cocktail that drove Dr. Alexander mad! She thinks that my condition makes me immune to the damage...

The surface is my only chance at freedom. But Mother took the one person I knew from above and murdered him in front of my eyes... Father. If I could only find a way to bring him back...

Eleanor Lamb - Behind Mother's Back

I've been quarantined, but Mother's unaware of the extent of my connection to the new Little Sisters. I don't just emphasize with them; I can control them directly. They are my hands and my eyes now.

Better yet, we have found Father's body, and took a gene sample. The girls are hiding the samples inside those dolls we used to make. It's only a matter of time before I work out a way to rig one of those Vita-Chambers to seek his genetic signature... and then... I can't wait to see Mother's face...

Eleanor Lamb - Freeing Father

Eleanor: We've done it. Father is back... right under Mother's nose. I've contacted a woman named Tenenbaum through my Sisters. We worked out a way to free his mind inside that suit... to awaken the man inside the monster. Mother's entire belief structure is corrupt-and if I know one thing about Father, it's that he will believe in escape.

Lamb: Eleanor, it is time for you to accept your duty to the people. When you awake, you'll understand...

Eleanor: No! Get away from me!

Eleanor Lamb - Destructive Learning

Hello, mother. As you've always said, I shouldn't be allowed to wander the city in my condition, but without going outside, it's harder to hear much about the world-so I'm learning at home!

This, I think, is a... porcelain tea service in the style of Louis the 15th, isn't that right? (shatter)

Now that's a fascinating sound!

And this is called a "stained glass window," hand-crafted by your adoring flock... they've gone to a lot of trouble to capture your likeness, haven't they? (shatter)

Gil Alexander - Improving on Suchong's Work

Doctor Suchong's death was a nasty blow to the Protector program, but I'm gradually settling into his role, picking up the slack that his carelessness left behind. We are gaining steam again, but I'm not satisfied. Yes, the "Big Daddy" defends the girl... but he is programmed only for the fight, like a sheepdog who wanders off unless a wolf is tearing at his flock.

When no aggressor is present, he regards his Little Sister as he might a common houseplant. We need something more, something stronger: an unbreakable physiological bond.

Gil Alexander - A Father's Love

We lost another of the Alpha Series Protectors today in testing. Somewhere outside the city limits, he simply vanished. For these men, Rapture has no walls. We must find a method of conditioning them against abandonment of the Little Sisters.

Something physical... possibly even lethal. The lab aids are starting to call them "Big Daddies"... perhaps there's some genius to that. Bonded pairs... connected by a love that kills.

Gil Alexander - The Rumbler

The rate of Sister loss has become unacceptable as Big Daddies are brought down like elephants under a pack of hyenas. In response, we've begun production of a newly designed Big Daddy model, nicknamed the "Rumbler."

He launches high explosive munitions to disperse groups of Splicers, followed by miniature automated turrets to mop up the stragglers. Our tests find that the Rumbler's performance is highly effective, if messy. In Rapture's arms race, Splicers aren't the only ones that are evolving.

Gil Alexander - The Pair Bond Mechanism

The Pair Bond is a success! If somehow an Alpha Series wanders too far from his Little Sister, our physical failsafe kicks in: a chemical trigger that induces coma.

It is a symbiotic relationship, enforced by the girl's pheromone signature. The first successful candidate was... Delta, I believe.

It is unfortunate that poor Dr. Suchong will not be here to raise a glass.

Gil Alexander - A Secular Saint

The genius of Sofia Lamb is a thing of empathy, a profound moral sense; I can only describe her... as a kind of... of secular saint. But dividing her loyalty evenly across the world at large spreads it so thin as to be invisible to some. Love... I have found, is... beneath her.

Naturally, Ryan arrested her... gave her to Sinclair to incarcerate somewhere. But upon her escape, she took the city... and changed my life forever.

Gil Alexander - Growing Up

The Little Sisters are getting older... which is troubling. As they reach adolescence, they become aggressive, feral. Worse, the ADAM they ingest contains traces of lethal Plasmids left over from the war. The Splicers are becoming for more effective predators as well. Our Big Daddies are falling left and right. Perhaps... perhaps the elder sisters could be trained to sniff out the lost ADAM, and reclaim it for us. Yes... from what I've seen, they certainly wouldn't have to wait for the culprit to die...

Gil Alexander - Agnus Dei

Agnus Dei

Gil Alexander - Prototype

Our hope was to bond a Little Sister to a single Protector, so she had to be expendable in case of error. As we were fabricating a Father-bond, we couldn't really afford to have the girl's parents asking around. So Fontaine's orphanages provided, and the procedure was an unprecedented success.

If I had only known who the child was... Eleanor... I'm so sorry.

Gil Alexander - Source of Volunteers

Anyone in the Plasmid business ultimately requires the use of human test subjects. It's our dirty little secret, and to be frank, Rapture doesn't really want to know, provided the end product is sound.

Volunteers were... scarce, even as the economy buckled. A man named Sinclair approached us with a seemingly limitless supply. He... rented them to us, bound and sedated... no questions asked.

Gil Alexander - Abort the Experiment

I was to be Sofia Lamb's greatest achievement-a living composite of all Rapture's genius in the body of a single man... unfettered by self-interest. Now, I am nothing more to her than a failed experiment. My scores on tests of intelligence and moral reasoning are still noteworthy... but declining sharply. She has abandoned me... and I do not have long before psychosis takes me.

Gil Alexander - Solving for X

Sofia believes the perfect human altruist is "just a formula, waiting on us to solve for X." Intelligence and consciousness are not the same, she argued. Awareness of self naturally becomes obsession with it.

So if we could suppress my sense of self, but imbue me with the cognitive capacity to serve the common welfare... we could thereby generate the first Utopian.

And then, Sofia said... at long last... Utopia would follow.

Gil Alexander - Outlived Usefulness

Well, that's the end of the Alpha Series. The Pair Bond simply worked too well. That madwoman Tenenbaum bit the company hand, turning some of the bonded Sisters human again. Others were... lost to Splicers. Either way, the trauma proved too much for the bonded Protectors, resulting in unreasoning rage, or coma. We can harness their suicidal aggression as foot soldiers... but no more, I'm afraid. Today I saw one kneeling near a Gatherer's Garden and... and crying.

Gil Alexander - Big Sister

We put our eldest Sister through a new regimen of physical and mental conditioning, and suited her up with modified Protector equipment of my design. The younger ones have dubbed her a "Big Sister."

Sadly, this is a stopgap. Between rogue Splicers and the aging of the girls, we'll run out of viable Little Sisters soon. After that... the surface may be our only source...

Mark Meltzer - They Called It Rapture

Barely made it down alive, but here it is, and it's real. Rapture. This is where that thing took my... my poor baby girl. From what I saw in the sub, most of the city's in ruins. But there were lights here and there.

And shapes, moving... I'm rambling. Scared, I guess. But maybe, if I find this "Doctor Lamb" I keep hearing over the PA... I'll find Cindy too.

Mark Meltzer - "Child" and Guardian

I found one of those children at last. Filthy dress, all alone. I approached her... praying that it was my little girl.

But she was... gorging herself on blood from a corpse. It wasn't her. I stared, just, just reeling, and then that skinny... armored freak that took Cindy jumped me, shrieking like an animal!

I escaped but... could Cindy have become one of those... things? I've got to find her, now more than ever.

Mark Meltzer - What Happened to the People?

These... people are hooked on some kind of genetic wonder-drug called ADAM. I've read the word "Splicers" scribbled on walls like a warning. One of them... cornered me, and Christ, his face-I had a gun, but I choked-and then out of nowhere we both heard this... singing and he took off like hell on wheels.


It sounded like a kid-a little girl! Cindy's alive... I know it in my gut.

Mark Meltzer - Blood and Lamb

This Lamb woman's powers of manipulation are almost scary... her people are using the girls from the surface to gather ADAM from Lamb's followers... it's in the blood, and eventually they give themselves over, like dying is an honor.

I'd almost feel sorry for them... if they didn't have my daughter. I'm going to find Lamb... and take Cindy back, one way or another.

Mark Meltzer - Lamb's Operation

Lamb's followers are blinded by her promises, but it's clear that this "religion" she's cooked up is an elaborate front for some insane science experiment.

She's twisting these girls into... into slaves, bringing ADAM back to Lamb's science facility, "Fontaine Futuristics."

I've got to find it... I've heard the Splicers mumbling that Alexander is the ferry man...

Mark Meltzer - Lost and Found

I found her... found Cindy, by this... this rusted carousel. But she was just standing there, staring, waiting for the music. She doesn't even recognize me... what have they done to her? Listen to her...

...Listen, if anyone hears this, I have to know how to cure her, I-No! get back! She's my little girl!

Grace Holloway - Disappeared

He's gone. James was the only man I ever loved... and now it's like he never even came to Rapture. He heard me sing at the Limbo Room, came up all bashful.

He liked hearin' songs about what it's really like to live in this town... I think he's been trying to organize folks against Ryan, and now he's gone, and I'm here, singing "Rise, Rapture, Rise"... scared to death they're gonna come for me!

Grace Holloway - Better Times with Lamb

My folks lived in the St. Louis Hooverville in '32... and the Drop is worse by a mile. Nobody's supposed to live down here, city pissing on us. Never dry. Ryan doesn't care. And Fontaine's a damn crook.

But Doctor Lamb cares. We're still people to her. She's offering free mental counseling on Sundays. When I go, I get the feeling she's got a plan for Rapture... and for me.

Grace Holloway - Closing the Limbo Room

That's it, we have to close down the Limbo. Bomb goes off in that fancy place uptown, and everybody panics... pulls their money out of the banks... a whole city tuggin' on the same dollar bill.

So the banks fold, and maybe one in ten got their savings out... who's going to come hear me nightingalin' about how broke they are? How am I going to provide for little Eleanor?

Grace Holloway - A Gift from Lamb

I know it's wrong to feel so fine right now, but I can't seem to quit this grin. Doctor Lamb came to tell me that Ryan's finally going to lock her up. It's going to gut the believers. And I should feel the same.

But, Sofia remembered that I... that I was barren. And she asked me to take care of her baby while she's gone, baby Eleanor Lamb! Gorgeous, clever little girl. I have a child now, and it's going to put the whole world alright.

Grace Holloway - Failing Lamb

Empty house. Only an echo to my name. Eleanor, baby... where are you? I turned my back, and someone took you, it happened so quick. I'm not even a half-momma to you, girl. I couldn't protect you...

This poster of Doctor Lamb in my room is staring me down like it knows I'm ashamed... I've always been loyal to your real mother, Eleanor... always trusted her with my secrets.

But I lost you, what will the Doctor think of me now?

Augustus Sinclair - Wooden Nickels

Andrew Ryan. He reckoned the free market was some kinda holy spirit gonna lead us all over the rainbow-and I reckon it's a big fat hooker too dim to spot a wooden nickel.

So old Andy went an' became his own ghost, and I whittled, nickels 'til I made a mint.

Augustus Sinclair - Wrong Side of the Tracks

Ol' Pauper's Drop's the worse neighborhood in Rapture-but it's a hell of an opportunity to raise up some ah, affordable housin'. When Atlantic Express was constructin' their luxury passenger line, this place was hallowed out beneath as flophouses for the railway crew.

Nobody was s'posed to reside down here long-term, but when you're broke in this town, you're not exactly swimmin' in alternatives. I don't favor spendin' more than an hour or so down here at a time. There ain't a side of the tracks more wrong than under 'em.

Augustus Sinclair - Profit Coming, Profit Going

Now, I'm a modest man. But my piecemeal needle scam's an outright masterpiece: some slob shacked up here buys a box of syringe parts from me for twice what it's worth. He assembles 'em in his rat hole, and I buy back the finished product... for a dime against the dollar that I'll get from Ryan.

Profit comin', profit goin, Ol' Andy rambles on about the Great Chain... I got people shellin' out to pull it for me!

Augustus Sinclair - Farther to Fall

I do love Siren Alley, The kinda place you go to scratch an itch you're ashamed of-even in a town with no laws.

But that's not why I favor it. The place started out as the mason's quarter, all builders an' architects, proper as you please. An' it just tickles me when someone in a fancy hat falls in the mud.

Like a lot of the ladies down here, Siren Alley was born with a more respectable name... but only God remembers what it was.

Augustus Sinclair - Selling Ryan Short

Persephone... secret home of Sinclair Solutions. I bet against Andy Ryan's vision o'harmony in Rapture-offered him a quiet place to send anybody who wasn't workin' out. And now, I'm sittin' on my own private think tank. Technically, Utopia shouldn't have much use for a detention facility... but if you do business as long as I have... well, you learn to pick a brand name from the writin' on the wall.

Augustus Sinclair - Sacrifices

Things aren't so rosy for Lamb's little collective farm down here, no matter how much influence she's got with the inmates. She keeps feedin' Ryan more an' more o' her people for the Big Daddy program in order to keep the rest of her flock alive...

I think she's gettin' desperate. I oughta have Weir double the orderlies on all the major junctions.

Stanley Poole - Working for Sinclair

I uh... met with Sinclair today, of "Sinclair Solutions." It's this pseudo-legal firm he set up to take problems Ryan doesn't want to admit he has, and make them go away.

I could fill forty front pages at the Tribune with stories about this fella, if he wasn't paying me not to.

And he's got work for me, right? I ask what, and he flashes me these thousand dollar Steinman teeth, sayin' this job'll quote change history end quote.

Stanley Poole - Mole

I wish I could publish this stuff. It's newsman pay dirt.

Sinclair says Ryan's making a move against Sofia Lamb, and they want to cut me in on the action. They're building a case that Lamb's a closet pinko. Sort of an undercover thing-so, I cozy up to this guy Wales who works for Lamb, makin' like I want to join up.

Then I find out whether he grew his beard for Jesus... or Karl Marx.

Stanley Poole - Patronage

Well, I'm in... yep-yours truly is the newest member of the Rapture family. I fed Wales a line about how the Tribune was stopping me from telling the people what's what-and without a word, he hands me an invite to this "artist's retreat" here at the park.

Lamb bought my frustrated novelist act... she's even sponsorin' me to ink it while I'm here. Except my story's all about her... and I don't think she's gonna like the way it ends.

Stanley Poole - Lamb Flouts the System

Doctor Lamb's trying to take the city by sponsoring the artsy types here... big thinkers, to speak out against Ryan in their work.

And all of it is right here in the Park galleries, open to the public. Lamb ain't even chargin' for it... and in Rapture that's just... brazen, like some kinda naturist camp where everybody wears pope hats and nothing else! Won't be long before Ryan's cronies can move in... and I can finally stop holding my breath.

Stanley Poole - Gotta Keep it Together

So... Ryan's goons are sweating me to prove this place is a closet commune, but I need time. And Lamb's kid keeps staring me down like she knows that I'm a phony.

I keep thinking of Jhonny Topside, though. Took real guts to find Rapture like he did... makes it easier not to crack if I sort of... imagine that I'm him.

It's a good thing I can't tell Lamb that though. She'd probably say I got a secret need to fall into his arms and make wild whoopee!

Stanley Poole - A Plan

So. Lamb broke out, and she's coming back. Wow. Ok. Didn't see that coming, but OK.

That is going to be... what am I gonna do!? And I... I've heard some of these, alot of these people down here, talking. Some of them I know saw the thing with Eleanor, and who knows who knows what. You can't just stop, you know, a whole... cult... from, from talking. Can ya? Maybe you can. Yeah. Maybe you can.

"Big Kate" O' Malley - Attention: Workers!

Lesson one, mop jockeys: You are under the ocean now. If you feel the soft patter of rain on your hat, you're already fired.

Lesson two: You can jumpstart a dead generator with a direct spark, but clear the guests outta the pool first! Scares these rich pricks to watch a workin' stiff hurlin' thunderbolts, ya follow me?

"Big Kate" O' Malley - Dionysus Park's Weakness

McDonagh, listen: there's a helluva structural flaw here in Dionysus Park-a leak in the primary drainage pipeline could flood this whole joint. Faulty pressure locks would seal in every sorry soul.

One clumsy Big Daddy knocks open the wrong pipe and hey presto! Lamb's little art show turns into fish city.

God forbid the wrong element finds out...

Rachelle Jacques - Fitness

My husband is such a perfect idiot. Throws away all his spending money on Gene Tonics to affect a look of physical fitness... so he'll have an excuse to sit on his rear all day listening to radio serials!

"Stephen," I tell him, "if you want to be fit, come swim laps with me, the old-fashioned way. It's your mind that's atrophying." Maybe I'll start sneaking some Brain Boost into his daily regimen...

Carlson Fiddle - The Old Sheepdog

I was hired to engineer a park the likes of which no man has seen, and now all I do is watch over it like a grizzled sheepdog. My first line of mechanical puppets made the children here coo with wonder. But Ryan thought my vision was immature... "antiquated," he said. This place could have been something magical, but instead he's turned it into school... no, a cathedral. Dedicated to himself.

Carlson Fiddle - Escape Plan

I been rationing my supplies ever since the park got cut off from the rest of Rapture. Gotta stay strong. I'm holed up in this workshop, surrounded by these wailing brats, tryin' to beat their way in. They want my food, my guns... they want it all! But I've got a plan-gonna fix up the transport sub that's been rusting in the maintenance bay. Then I'm gonna get the hell out of this hole. These animals want Rapture? They can have it.

Nina Carnegie - Volunteer

I love the kids in Ms. Englert's third grade class, but boy, I had NO idea what I was getting into, volunteering to chaperone this New Year's sleepover party at Ryan Amusements...

Donny... Donny! Get down off of that exhibit, and I told you, spit out that gum! You'll choke! (sigh) The kid's parents deserve a night off to enjoy New Years, but I'm at my wit's end-Donny! I TOLD you...

Nina Carnegie - You, Me and 1959

I think all of the children have finally fallen asleep. And now that the park is all quiet... I can't sleep myself! I guess it's just you and me, Mr Voice recorder, You, me, and 1959. I wonder what the new year will-what... what was that? Something's happened, the lights are going out. Kids, stay in your sleeping bags, it's gonna be fine...

Nina Carnegie - Deterioration

Two weeks at my last count... two weeks since we were trapped in this rotten park. I haven't been eating... the children need all the supplies we've got left. Need them more than I do. I... I don't know what's gonna happen. I can feel myself getting weaker. The children have noticed the condition I'm in, of course... what will happen once I'm gone? They'll be... all alone...

Silas Bantam - Cutting Corners

Use to be there was no margin in runnin' the gift shop-I couldn't hardly sell off this tourist crap for a penny more'n it cost to manufacture! Then I met this straight-shooter named Sinclair, and he laid a sweet deal on me. Said he's got some hard-luck folks down in Pauper's Drop can whip us this junk at half the cost I use to pay. Yeah, I've had to pick a needle or two out of the shipments, but all in all, nobody's the wiser... an I'm all the richer.

Brigid Tenenbaum - Return

I am back in Rapture, after so many years. The Little Ones I rescued are grown up, and think of me no more. After what I once did to them, it was a joy to be forgotten.

But now, all around the world, children vanish by the sea. Kidnapped. And so I return... in fear of what I already know: Someone is making new Little Ones... continuing my work, my sins. Even if I am to die for it, I must stop them.

Brigid Tenenbaum - The Situation

Sofia Lamb has taken Rapture, and is responsible for stealing children from the surface. Her splicers destroyed my submersible and forced me to run.

But the ticket booth here is secure... and though I cannot trust him, Sinclair is a valuable ally. I have already rescued a few of the new Little Ones from Lamb. They all want to know how we will get home. I wish I had the right words for them.

Prentice Mill - Just a Fad

There would be no Rapture without me. No city without the Atlantic Express. Ryan took his first grand tour on my flagship coach! But these days, personal bathyspheres are all the rage. My rails only connect the oldest parts of Rapture now, and the city's just... just left me behind.

Plenty of cash in the bank, though. This private vehicle craze will blow over soon.

Prentice Mill - The End of the Line

This is it . It's over. I built this railroad from nothing... played by Mr. Ryan's rules. But then he asks me to sink my own cash reserves into the banks to give Rapture some breathing room, and now... now Austen Goddamned Bathysphere wants to buy me out. Decommission the entire rail!

I have no family... and no friends. I am the Atlantic Express... and this... this is the end of the line...

Tobias Riefers - Clinic Code at the Fishbowl

What did they expect? You keep enough drugs stashed in this clinic to splice up a rhinoceros, of course every poor soul in the Drop's gonna start beatin' down your door. It's my job to think up a new key code to keep 'em out. Seems like every other day now... Nuts... I'll mull it over for a while at the Fishbowl Diner.

Jackie Rodkins - Sunday Services

Been hearin' rumors. Sounds like somebody name o' Wales is startin' up worship services down in Siren Alley, believe it or not. All faiths and creeds welcome, they says. They got big promises... salvation, immortality. A way outta here. I don't care how crazy it sounds, a way outta Rapture's music to my ears. Next Sunday morning... I'll be there.

Mike Novak - Doctor Lamb

Third session today, with this amazing limey shrink, Doctor Sofia Lamb. She said that all Ryan's horse#@!* about always looking out for number one is turning us little guys against each other. And what we need is unity. Solidarity! Then she held up a mirror. Turns out I wear my hair and moustache just like Ryan.

So today, I'm spreading the word about Lamb. And tonight I'm shaving my whole stupid head!

Devin LeMaster - Dating Tip

I've got a little dating tip for ya, Jimbo, it'll get you out of that lonely hearts club for good. This scheme works 100 percent of the time, guaranteed. First, find some Betty and take her to Ryan Amusements. Then ya go to the gift shop, buy her a teddy bear-this is key, I ain't kidding' around. Then... ya buy her a ticket on "Journey to the Surface." As soon as you hit that first scare? Bingo. Tunnel. Of. Love.

Sammy Fletcher - Escape from Rapture

Sammy: All right, Diary-last entry! Lizzy and I... we found a 'sphere and we're going home! Ain't that right, baby? Next stop, topside!

Lizzy: Oh, I love you. It was you who saved us, Sammy. It was you, button. I-what was that? What's that sound?

Sammy: She's seen us! It's Lamb! Torpedo!!! I'll try to...
(Screaming, gurgling)

Gideon Wyborn - The Butterfly

The blue morpho bounces off the glass as I watch. I fold these paper effigies as secret badges, for the faithful. The morpho caterpillar doesn't spin a cocoon... it just grows armor on the inside... before the change. It is us. To wear a butterfly is to support Doctor Lamb and the Family. Before long, Rapture will split wide... and take wing. Imago is coming.

Elliot Nelson - What a Snap

...And that's a hundred! What a snap! Give Sinclair a few bucks for a load of vials and needles, then it's evenings putting these syringes together while I listen to the radio... sell 'em back to Sinclair at twice the price! Whatta racket! A few pin-pricks here and there's nothin' to complain about. Gonna be back on top soon. Thank you, Mr. Sinclair... sucker...

Rock Flanagan, P.I. - Camera in Hock

Another day, no clients. Atlas and Ryan start goin' at it hot and heavy, and all my business dries up. Used to be easy: put the eye on some spliced-up dame's wandering husband and rake in the dough. Now it's got so bad I hadda put my camera in hock at King Pawn. Makes a guy consider splicin'up himself... if I had two dimes to rub together, that is.

Leo Hartwig - Field Trial #1

"Survival of the fittest." That's the rule in the Drop, the only rule. These numbskulls can't see the potential in leftover traces of Sports Boost, Armored Shell, the tonics for increasing muscle mass density... but I see the king of the jungle.

First field trial of my new formula. Subject Hartwig, Leo.
Here goes...

ughh... urghh... rrrrrrrrrrrRRRRRAAAGHHH!!

Gloria Parson - Where has Harry Gone?

Another day waiting for Harry to come home. I told him not to speak up against Mr. Ryan's policies, and now he's missing! Just never came home.

I went by the bookstore and all his books are gone too. I don't know what to do. Now I have to deal with that awful Sinclair just to have a roof over my head!

Billy Parson - A Gift from Billy

Dear yellow-eyed girl: My name is Billy and I saw you the other day at the merry-go-'round. I think you are very pretty and I like your blue dress and the songs you sing about angels. My mom says your dad is scary but I think he is strong and nice like a comic book hero. I got you a gift and put it in the basement where nobody will find it. The secret code for the door is one-oh-eight-oh. I hope you like it. I will wave the next time I see you so you know it's me.

Harry Parson - No More Hope Left

It's time to leave this place. I held out hope for months that I'd see my family again, but it seems like this rope is my only ticket to freedom. I'm sure Ryan has seized the bookstore, no telling where Gloria and Billy will have to... live... Can't seem to form a complete thought anymore. Can't sleep with that glow coming in the windows. Things out there watching us. Maybe I'll get to sleep now...

Simon Wales - A Silent God

Lord... what more do ye wish of me? Your wretch of a servant waits for word... I have followed the letter of the Holy Mother Lamb, though she will not tell me of the day of your return.

I watched as ye smote down the false Father, Andrew Ryan, who tempted us away from your radiant gaze. But ye would not speak to me, Lord!

I have built for ye this great temple and gathered your flock, yet still you are silent. Will ye not strike me poor brother blind so he may at last behold your glory, as was done to Paul on the road to Damascus? I am alone, Lord. Alone... and waiting for a sign.

Simon Wales - Lamb's salvation

Daniel... you and I drafted Rapture's blueprint together... "Wales and Wales, Architects." Do you remember? But Andrew Ryan led us astray, my brother... turned us from the Almighty.

Doctor Lamb offers you salvation, Daniel. I ask only for proof that the barest flicker of faith remains in you. I left a gift for you at the Pink Pearl, in your... offices. Find the code on it, brother, and we shall pray together for your sorry soul.

Simon Wales - Guidance of Lamb

Andrew Ryan left us wandering confused and alone amongst yesterday's wreckage. But Sofia Lamb shows us that we are not alone, we are together, as a family. So when you see a man brought to his knees, recognize that he is your brother, and pull him up. Sofia Lamb teaches us: What is in common is good. What is irreducible is right.

She guides us all to the indivisible, along a river of ADAM. Rapture's daughter, Eleanor, shall be our vessel. In her, we shall be reborn!

Simon Wales - The Creed of the Faithful

We believe in the Daughter of the lamb, hallowed savior and anointed vessel, whose blood with our blood, sin with our sin, mind with our minds, life with our life, lifts us up from the depths, transcends base temptation, and delivers us all from ego.

We commend ourselves to the new and unknown, borne by our common strength, and guided by the lamb.

Daniel Wales - "Father Simon Wales"

Blasted Simon. So Rapture leaks... cryin' about it's only gonna add to the surplus o' moisture, isn't it?

Nothin's to say it's our design, but Simon goes to see Doctor Lamb anyway-beset by guilt 'cause we can't find another contract... And he comes out the other side sayin' he's always wanted to take the orders-he's "father Simon Wales" now!

If I ever see that Sofia Lamb in the street I'm gonna give her the back o' me f@#$in' hand and a knock on the head besides!

Daniel Wales - Wales an' Wales

(Sigh...)F@#$ it. I'm proper drunk and feelin' introspective. Now, in the motherland, Simon and I designed cathedrals together. But I was the black ol' sheep back there, never believin' a word o' the Jesus bollocks meself.

Then Andrew Ryan says he wants Wales an' Wales for Rapture-a cathedral with no God, befittin' the ascent of man.

Now I'm runnin' girls... and Simon thinks he's saving souls. Simon Wales-ha! Can ya believe I shared a womb with such a sap?!

Daniel Wales - The Date is the Code

Tonight, I had a pain in me head, and this time it wasn't from the whining of the whores. So naturally I came up to me office to murder it with a drink. And there on me liquor rack... was a bottle of sacramental wine from me dear brother Simon. And of course, the vintage date on the label is the code to enter his territory.

Nineteen-nineteen. I should pass his bleedin' wine through me system and send it back warm.

Dusky Donovan - Double Standard

Sure, I've had some Johns in my time and they've all got their kinks, but I think Rupert beats all. Keeps wanting me to splice up "in the act"... says it'll heighten it for both of us. I said honey, I ain't doing it for the heights, I'm doing it for the scratch. Besides, Daniel would have a fit if I started needling. He does it himself, of course. But what's good for the gander gets the goose thrown off the Drop!

Jamie Byass - Plasmid Shipment

Listen, my supplier's got a new shipment of Plasmids coming' in, and I need you to pick 'em up from the lab in Hedone Plaza. There's a hidden switch to open the back door-it's tucked away under the cash register in the shop front. And don't let nobody see you do it! Otherwise we'll have Splicers crawlin' all over the damn place trying' to get a taste.

Frank Fontaine - An Empty Niche

This Lamb twist went after Ryan all cockeyed. Solidarity angle was smart at first. Poorhouses and breadlines? High-grade bunko. And that religious rights debate-hahahaha! Gotta wonder if she staged it just to watch Ryan squirm up there in his monkey suit.

Lamb's only problem is she really buys into the whole song an' dance! Savin' the world-hah! Rapture just ain't her town.

Ryan's got her on ice somewhere now... and I figure that opens up the charity scam for the professionals.

Frank Fontaine - Falling into Place

New face. I have a new goddamn face-who'da thought? Rapture... paradise of the confidence man.

I gotta keep revising the Atlas voice. I figure the accent gives me an excuse to lock myself in a room with a bottle and count the cash. War's on in full now, boy... and I've got a hell of a surprise for Andrew Ryan. Long time comin'. And right about now, I expect the prodigal son is bookin' his flight...

Frank Fontaine - Goodbye to Fontaine

Every time Ryan turns up the heat, I know I'm a little bit closer to beatin' him at his own game.

But now the game's changin'-Ryan's boys are comin' in heavy-lookin' to knock down my door and take what's mine. Like this is the first time I had to dodge a bullet.

They're comin' to my house expectin' a show, but they're gonna get a disappearin' act.

Say goodbye to Fontaine... and hello to Atlas.

Warden Nigel Weir - Out with the Old...

Looks like Sinclair's been ousted. He wasn't slick enough to avoid the boot this time, but at least it wasn't a firing squad. Lamb proved she's got the ear of the general population down here, so it would probably be prudent to play along for awhile, see where this goes. She says she'll let me keep my little fiefdom here in Holding, as long as I agree to help supply her "therapy sessions." No qualms there. These sorry buggers could use some rehabilitation.

Warden Nigel Weir - Magic Sauce

Lamb's attention seems to have drifted from my prisoners to her daughter. Guess she figures they're irredeemable. Now I got guys clamoring for their next fix of ADAM, and I've gotta pull teeth to squeeze any out of the good Doctor. Guess I'm lucky her treatments kept them too weak to storm the tower, or they'd have my guts for garters.

Warden Nigel Weir - My Prison

Guess I had the wrong of it, when it came to Doctor Lamb... she explained how my cravings for control were rotting me out from the inside. We found all these incidents in my log where I made it easy for a convict to get the jump on me, just so I could bloody punish him. Christ.

But I believe I can do some good down here, now... with the family... well, we have a shot at surviving that f@#$%^& bedlam going on up there. Maybe even take the city back.

Thomas - The Definition of Despair

This place is the absolute definition of despair. Here we are, locked away from the outside world, suspended over a pit with no hope of release. And what's our charge?! Ryan has no room for differences of opinion in his precious Rapture? I hope the whole place comes crashing down around his ears.

Dodge - A Trade

Hey Murphy, it's Dodge. A little birdie told me you found out the Warden's code. Send a message to my cell in Block A telling me where you hid the code, and I'll consider your debts paid.

Mattson - First Two Digits

The Warden's ignored my warnings for far too long. I'm taking this into my own hands-I've secured a Hack Tool to nullify his Turrets and subvert the bots. I also figured out the code. It's two, six...

Murphy - A Generous Offer

Gee Mr. Dodge, that's quite a generous offer. I hid the code in the community bathroom, in the tank of the last toilet on the left. I also stashed some other loot there for a rainy day. It's all yours. Good Luck usin' the code.

Connor - Last Two Digits

I caught a glimpse of the Warden entering the code to the tower today. Last two digits were seven and three. Didn't catch the rest... maybe I can just figure it out, trial and error. Wonder how long that'd take.

Dr. Edward Grimes - A Simple Question

Doctor: Name...?
Patient: Wha? Where am I? Ahhh!
Doctor: Name...?
Patient: What the f@#$ did you do with my wife?! Ahhh!
Doctor: Name...?
Patient: Let me out of this chair! Ahhhhhhhhh!

Dr. Edward Grimes - They Feel Pain

Now, one of the girls managed to dart past the nurse today and throw herself over the railing in the lobby. Not certain if she was trying to end her own life or merely escape. Either way, her legs had healed by the time I managed to get down to the first floor where she lay. Now without proper setting, the rapid healing process had fused her bones back together at odd angles. We had to re-break and set them almost a dozen times each due to the small window of viability. Now those children may be immortal, but I can verify that they feel pain. Advising Doctor Lamb on higher doses of sedatives to keep this from happening again.

Dr. Edward Grimes - Alleviating Pain

My first inclination when Doctor Lamb gave me my mandate to alleviate pain was to block its neural pathways. Now the preliminary results were promising, too, until some of the children started chewing their own tongues off out of ignorance. Need to sequester them away from the others so as not to cause undue stress on the remaining subjects.

Harold Darby - Legs, Mouths, Arms, and Eyes

With this damn faulty memory of mine, I need to record a clue so I don't forget the keycode. Brown legs, red mouths, blue arms, green eyes. Now to secure this log somewhere. Argh!

Wilson - Such Freedom

Delta was in top form today! The guards tried to make him take another dose of whatever the hell it is they're pumping into him, and he managed to take on all four of 'em at once. Snappin' legs and arms, blood EVERYwhere. They say one of the guys might not even wake up. I wish I could be that free...

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